We all have friends, boyfriends, girlfriends etc.- people that we sometimes we want to hold on to. People we don’t let go because we think we should keep them or aren’t ready to let them go, but we’d be better off without them in our lives. This is something that isn’t easy. Sometimes it’s something that can make me feel guilty because I know that as people we aren’t perfect or I think about how things were before. But, it’s important to recognise when someone just isn’t healthy for you- this doesn’t mean that they are bad people or that you have to fall out with them. Just that maybe you need some distance. Below are some of the signs to when it could be time to let someone go.

How writing letters to myself has helped me

Yes, this sounds strange- sounds like something that could just make you feel awfully awkward and weird. But, writing letters to myself is something I started doing over the last 2 years and it's helped me in many ways. It has been a way I have motivated myself, got myself out of slumps and explored how I feel from more of an outside perspective. It has even helped with my self-esteem. I will admit it can feel a bit odd at the start, but there is a beauty to writing something just for you.

We are all always so busy - or feel the need to have things to do all that time that sometimes we neglect ourselves. We can get so caught up in helping others, giving ourselves to work, friends, family that we can forget to look after ourselves. Here are some of my fav things to do to reconnect with myself and sometimes just take that step back we very much need.

Having moved to a new city for university recently, identity and where I’m from is a subject I find myself talking about quite a lot. Meeting new people inherently involves presenting yourself and your identity (or parts of your identity). This has made it more obvious to me how identity is not something simple and there are many dimensions to it, which can sometimes be difficult to convey to people (especially someone you have just met or when you have a short period of time). This can sometimes leave you feeling a little lost or like you are not being true to yourself. 

I always find these posts really interesting to read and it is a nice opportunity to reflect on what I have learnt and the different ways I've grown. So here is what I would tell my younger self.

It is not new that there are unrealistic beauty standards set in the media, especially for women. This is particularly highlighted on social media - from photoshopped models to a lack of variety of body shapes and sizes and representation in terms of skin colour. 

Something I have got more into a habit of is setting goals for myself. I think I have always had some sort of target to keep myself grounded and focussed, but in the last two years, I have been setting more goals for myself regularly. For the past 2 years, I have enjoyed setting myself an overarching goal at the beginning of the year and then small goals in between to be aid reaching that bigger overall goal.  I like to categorise goals into personal and academic/ work, although sometimes the two can merge.

I think we have all been in a position where we have worried about the future. Worried about what is in store for us, or about not having things figured out.