Like most people, I feel I have had my fair share of coming across unkind people. Individuals that want to tear you down. It is inevitable - not everyone will like you and some people choose to consciously make or try and make others feel small. Over the years, I have found different ways of approaching and dealing with it and I am going to share what has helped me the most. This post is in relation to my previous post on bullying and are some of the things I incorporated into my life to deal with it better.
Bullying is something I realised I've experienced, but haven’t spoken about on here. I wanted to create a post with hope that maybe it can help someone else, can be relatable or start a conversation about it. I hope for those of you that can relate, that this brings comfort to you and reminds you that you are not alone in your experience.
I like to think I am a person that isn’t bothered by things, that can always move on. But, I can admit it’s often small gestures that I grow to really appreciate in people. The absence of this can sometimes upset me, or even sometimes little things, seemingly insignificant to others can annoy me. I guess we all have certain things that can bother us. This can sometimes lead to being labelled as “too sensitive”. I have found that often this involves negative connotations- the why can’t she control her emotions or why is she even getting upset? However, in my opinion, this doesn’t have to and shouldn’t necessarily be the case.
I’m definitely guilty of being one of those people who feel like they constantly have to be doing something. I have to be working towards something and doing nothing usually makes me feel guilty - guilty that I should be doing more or working towards something.
I used to see growing up as just getting older- little (and by little I mean when I was a child) me did not see it as anything else. It was just the excitement of being able to do more. Now as an older individual, I see that growing up is so much more than getting older: it is change; in your identity, in your life, discovering new things. Sometimes it is pain in order to learn. It is getting lost and finding your way again.
I think there’s a real tendency in society to put things off until we feel ‘ready’ or until there’s a better moment. I was recently thinking about moments I’ve really enjoyed or something I was proud of myself for and found that in most of these cases I didn’t feel as ‘ready’ as I thought I would, but I went ahead and did it anyway. That either allowed for self-growth or just for spontaneous moments that make life fun.
Finding my own voice and realising what I stand for was something that took me a while and I think is always an ongoing process. Writing this blog in many ways has helped me find my voice and has given me a platform to share things that are important to me. Learning to utilise it and discovering what I believed in has been one of the biggest things in boosting my confidence and self-esteem, which at one point in my life was very low. Hopefully, this can help someone on their journey to discover their own voice.
